Overcoming Emotional Abuse: Recognizing the Top Signs and How to Heal

Jan 7

Never give in to defeat; don't give up and accept less than you deserve. If you're still here today, know that there's a purpose for your life, and you are deserving of love. Countless individuals from diverse backgrounds have encountered abuse at some point in their lives, leaving them feeling bewildered, adrift, and devoid of hope. It's important to recognize that positive change is still within reach. Today is the day to take that step.

For some, the realization may not come until years later, when they become aware of the various forms of abuse and reflect on their experiences. Others may not recognize it at all at this moment as I write this. Abusers can come from any area of life, including parents, spouses, friends, leaders, or even bosses at work.

I urge you to share this post with others, as it has the potential to significantly impact someone's life and aid them in becoming a better person.

Understanding the difference between Abuse and Normal Conflict

Normal conflict involves disagreements and tensions that arise naturally in relationships due to differences in opinions, values, or perspectives. It is typically temporary and can be resolved through healthy communication and negotiation.

Emotional abuse on the other hand, involves one person exerting control, manipulation, or power over another through behaviors such as humiliation, intimidation, or isolation. It is characterized by a pattern of behavior intended to undermine the victim's self-esteem and sense of worth. Unlike normal conflict, emotional abuse is harmful, persistent, and often escalates over time, causing significant emotional and psychological harm to the victim.

That’s is why it’s really important to know the difference early on.

Characteristics of Emotional Abuse

Dominating Behaviors

Verbal Aggression
Jealous Behavior
Shaming and Blaming
Rejection
Gaslighting

People that have experienced emotional abuse often suffer from anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, and even chronic depression.

When you have experienced psychological abuse, you may find yourself seeking out similar types of people, just with different faces. However, it's important to recognize that someone who genuinely loves you will never make you suffer or leave you begging for their attention.

Your perception of a "healthy relationship" may not be healthy if you haven't fully healed. If you find yourself feeling confused, insecure, or experiencing low self-esteem in a new relationship, it's important to question whether it is truly healthy. Consider how the other person is contributing to your personal growth and well-being. Take the time to evaluate who is closest to you and determine whether they are there to support and uplift you, or to drain your spirit.

Things Emotional Abusers Do

Emotional abusers often disregard the boundaries you set and invade your privacy, showing a lack of respect. When this happens, it's crucial to take action by choosing to walk away.

They also tend to become hyper-critical and judgmental, refusing to admit when they are wrong. They may gaslight you, making you feel as though you are overreacting or irrational. Additionally, emotional abusers may dislike when you express your opinions or confront them with the truth. This type of abuse can lead individuals to feel the need to constantly prove themselves in order to feel accepted or loved. It's important to recognize these patterns early on.

The abuser often exhibit a belief that they are always right and that you have no say in the matter. They may resort to manipulation in order to gain control over you, using tactics such as gaslighting to distort your thinking.

Ways they Gaslight you:

"That never happened"

"You have a horrible memory"
"You are just like your Mother or Father"
"I’m sorry you think I hurt you"
"You should have known my reaction already"
"This person is doing much better than you"
"You're too emotional for no reason!"
"I won't do it again I Love You"
"You can never get things right"
including the silent treatment

Now that you have idea of this type of abuse, it’s important to consider and reevaluate whether anyone in your life may be manipulating you in some way. If this resonates with you, it's wise to create a safe plan to remove yourself from that situation. If you have tried setting boundaries and the other person continues to disregard them, then it may be time to walk away. It's okay to love certain people from a distance, particularly when they are not making any effort to improve themselves.

How can I start my healing process?

To begin your healing process, you can start by recognizing the qualities of a healthy relationship in other people. It may also be helpful to write down reminders of what constitutes a healthy relationship, serving as a positive reinforcement for yourself as you navigate this journey.

You should be able to:

You should feel empowered to say no to certain requests and express your opinions without the other person becoming excessively upset. This is an important aspect of a healthy and respectful relationship.
Respect each other's boundaries and personal space
Experience a sense of peace and mutual understanding when together
Have unwavering support during your victory and failures
Be with someone with whom you can envision building a meaningful future

Make the decision to break free today!

Understand that abuse is a Cycle and that those chains should no longer keep you bound if you want to move forward in life. You may find that an abuser may apologize only to repeat this cycle all over again.

Reach out to family or friends!

Please never feel afraid or ashamed to reach out for support. If you aspire to experience genuine joy, peace, and love from the right individuals, it's essential to distance yourself from emotionally unavailable people who are causing you distress.

It's important to be confident and fearless, and to stand up for yourself. Remember that no one has the right to your body except for the one who created you and bestowed you with purpose. When dealing with an emotional abuser, it's crucial to be aware of your emotions, maintain composure, and refrain from arguing or talking back.

Controlling your emotions in front of an abuser can reduce the likelihood of confrontation. Remind yourself that it's not your fault, and strive to maintain eye contact and an even-toned voice.

Work on improving yourself

Engaging in activities that promote self-improvement and well-being is essential. Exploring healthy hobbies or considering ventures such as starting a new business or incorporating regular exercise at the gym can help redirect your focus and alleviate overthinking and worry. Initiating something new has been shown to be beneficial. Remember, self-care is the best care!

You can check out my latest investment post here.

Create a smart strategy a Safe way out

Make a plan and stick to it especially if the abuser is also physically abusive. Seek help through hotlines like the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233. They provide 24/7 support and are capable of placing you somewhere safe.

Click here to get more information. (It will redirect you to their safe website)

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Being grateful every day for the little things in life. My Experience:

I am grateful to Jesus for everything He has done in my life, helping me overcome challenges I thought I would never get through. He has been my strength every day, and I believe He can do the same for you. Prayer is the key to finding true happiness, peace, joy, and freedom. .
God bless you! & I hope that I could encourage you in some way, and help you realize how special you are to God, your trauma does not not make you less worthy of love. You may feel like you're not good enough, but let me remind you that YOU are very much valuable!

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